I spoke with Chuck Chapman on The Way of the Confident Husband podcast about something I've watched transform countless men, yet most of us are still going without. Men's groups aren't just another self-help trend, they're essential medicine for the isolation and disconnection that's quietly eroding modern masculinity. If you're a man who's been doing the work alone, thinking you've got it handled, this conversation will challenge that assumption.
We got into embodiment work and why so many of us men are rewarded for being disconnected from our bodies. From a young age, we're taught that being tough means not feeling, not crying, pushing through. The problem is all that unprocessed emotional material doesn't just disappear. It gets stored in our bodies and becomes this kindling that can ignite at the smallest spark.
I shared some of my own journey with this work. I was a late bloomer who struggled terribly with anxiety around women. My first time having sex was at 26. That pain drove me to men's groups and shadow work, and honestly, I'm still catching myself avoiding feelings sometimes. I'll spend weeks or even months resisting something that would take two minutes to actually feel in my body once I finally let myself go there.
What's powerful about men's groups is you get these embodied transmissions from other men. You see a guy fully in his grief but still grounded in his power. Or you witness someone express fierce anger without it being destructive. It shows you what's possible beyond the two shitty options most of us think we have: be a macho asshole or be a nice guy who never gets what he wants.
The simplest starting point? Your breath. It's the one system that's both automatic and conscious. When you're aware of your breath, you're in your body, and you're present. That plus sweating a few times a week will do more for you than most therapy.
If you want to explore this work with me, check out evolutionarymen.net. I run men's groups, a Labor Day retreat, and a shadow work program that goes right to the heart of whatever origin story is running your life. Or just hang out on the site and see what resonates.
