The Secret to Masculine Success is Not What You Think

Whether it’s personal growth, creating a thriving relationship, or building a career of meaning and purpose, there’s one thing that more than anything else will determine the eventual outcome.

The ability to RECOMMIT.

Over my years of leading men’s groups and coaching men on dating, relationships, and career, I’ve seen this time and time again be the thing that makes all the difference.

Whenever we step towards something we want – be an external goal or a new internal way of being, it is INEVITABLE at some point we’ll get knocked off-center.

We’ll collapse into old ways of being, fail to follow through on our goals, or make errors along the way. It is THIS moment, that really defines us because of how we respond, do we totally collapse, give up, and get swallowed by shame, doubt, or frustration? Or do we dust ourselves off, recommit, and get RIGHT BACK TO IT?

So many of our greatest “hero” stories are about the latter – they are NOT tales of men who achieved greatest by walking down an easy path on the road to victory – instead they’re about men who get knocked around and just keep coming back – they keep RECOMMITTING (think Creed, Rocky, any sports movie, etc).

There was a time I was an avid runner in college hitting the trails every morning before class. One of my learnings during that time had to do with the fact that the runs never really got any easier – because I was always pushing myself to do better the runs themself never really got “easier”.

What totally transformed, however, was my ability to RECOVERY and RECENTER – my resiliency. When I first started running, I might run for 10 minutes and then stop and need another 5 minutes just to catch my breath. But as I stayed with the practice and kept recommitting to that morning run, (even when I missed days or weeks) – my recovery time COMPLETELY transformed. I could run hard for 45 minutes, and then when I stopped, catch my breath and be ready to go again after 90 seconds.

That is what it’s all about! That is our work as men. How quick can we RECOVER and RECOMMIT?

The man that fails but recommits 100 times, is going to get SO MUCH FURTHER than the man that never tries at all, or the man that gives up after a few setbacks.

Approach a woman and get rejected? Recommit to approaching the next one.

Started an art project that didn’t get finished? Recommit and bring it to a close.

Workout perfectly on schedule for 3 weeks and then skip a whole week? Come right back to it.

Learning how to become more resilient in our nervous systems to be able to recenter and recommit is one of the most powerful investments a man can make in himself.

If you want some help in taking back control of your love life and embody the practice of recommitting, watch our training and then let’s talk.


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